Lesson 11
I. Introduction.
Have you ever found yourself waiting for someone else to do a
job or task that needed done at home or at work? It is easy for
us to make a list in our minds about how much we have done or
accomplished in regard to things that need to be done. Often we
use this list to justify not doing something ourselves--we've
done our part of the work ! In the work of the Lord, many
use this to put the blame for things not done on someone else.
Often we find members who have not only retired from their secular
job but also from the work of the Lord. Let someone who has not
done as much as I have over the years do it! None of these attitudes
were exhibited by Jesus Christ or condoned in others by him. Esther
4:10-14, 5.
II. When in Doubt about Whose Turn It Is to Take Out the Trash,
Go Ahead and Take It Out.
If We're not careful, it's easy to become resentful about all
the responsibilities of daily living. If you think about it, it's
astonishing how easy it is for us to remember all the chores that
we do, as well as all the other responsibilities that we take
care of. But, at the same time, it's easy for us to forget all
the things that our spouse does on a daily basis. How convenient!
It's really difficult to become a contented person if you're keeping score of all you do. Keeping track only discourages you by cluttering your mind with who's doing what, who's doing more, and so forth. If you want to know the truth about it, this is the epitome of "small stuff." It will bring you far more joy to your life to know that you have done your part and someone else has one less thing to do, than it will to worry and fret over whose turn it is to take out the trash.
The strongest argument against this strategy is the concern that you'll be taken advantage of. This mistake is similar to believing it's important that you're always right. It is not important if you take out the trash a few more times than your spouse. Making things like garbage less relevant in your life will undoubtedly free up more time and energy for truly important things.
We are never taught in the Bible to keep a tally sheet on the
things that we have done. If we are instead focusing on helping
ourselves and others get to heaven, we can let God keep the tally
books for us!
III. Be Aware of the Snowball Effect of Your Thinking
A powerful technique for becoming more peaceful is to be aware
of how quickly your negative and insecure thought can spiral out
of control. Remember how Peter swore to the Lord that he would
not deny him, and even defended him physically in the Garden,
but then after some time and thought he chose to deny that he
even knew him. Have you ever noticed how uptight you feel when
you're caught up in your thinking? And to top if off, the more
absorbed you get in the details of whatever is upsetting you,
the worse you feel. One thought leads to another and yet another,
until at some point, you become incredibly agitated.
For example, you might wake up in the middle of the night and remember a phone call that needs to be made the following day. Then, rather than feeling relieved that you remembered such an important call, you start thinking about everything else you have to do tomorrow. You start rehearsing a probable conversation with your boss, getting yourself even more upset. Pretty soon you think to yourself, "I can't believe how busy I Am. I must make fifty phone calls a day. Whose life is this anyway?" and on and on it goes until you're felling sorry for yourself. For many people, there's no limit to how long this type of "thought attack" can go on. In fact, it's impossible to feel peaceful with your head full of concerns and annoyances.
The answer to this problem is to nip it in the bud before it
goes too far. If you are aware of the problem, then the next time
you start making a list of the things you need to do tomorrow,
stop yourself. Instead think about how grateful you are that God
gave you the ability to do the things you do. Think about the
wonderful things that God has done for us. Write down the things
you remembered that you need to do on a piece of paper and put
it where you will see it the next morning, or make a list of the
great things that we have because we are Children of God!
IV. Think of What You Have Instead of What You Want
One of the most pervasive and destructive mental tendencies that
we have is to focus on what we want instead of what
we have . It doesn't seem to make any difference
how much we have; we just keep expanding our list of desires,
which guarantees we sill remain dissatisfied. (Remember the Rich
man and his Bigger Barns). The mind-set that says "I'll be
happy when this desire is fulfilled" is the same mind-set
that will repeat itself once that desire is met. Often if we don't
get what we want, we keep thinking about all that we don't have--and
remain dissatisfied. If we do get what we want, we simply re-create
the same thinking in our new circumstances. So, despite getting
what we want, we still remain unhappy. Happiness can't be found
when we are yearning for new desires. There is a way to be happy.
It involves changing the emphasis of our thinking from what we
want to what we have. Rather than wishing that your spouse were
different, try thinking about the wonderful qualities that they
possess. Instead of complaining about your salary, be grateful
that you have a job. Rather than wishing you were able to take
a vacation to Hawaii, think of how much fun you have had close
to home. The list of possibilities is endless! Each time that
you find yourself falling into the "I wish life were different"
trap, back off and start over. Take a breath and say a short prayer
of thanks to God! If you focus on the good qualities of your spouse,
they will be more loving. If you are grateful for your job, you
will do a better job. If you focus on enjoying the time that you
have at home, you'll end up having more fun. Sit down tonight
and make a list of the things you have and think about how grateful
you are to have them, thank God for them and you will be happier.
Luke 16:19-31
Happy Verses: Deut. 33:29, I Kings 10:4-9.